The framed reference #StarFishClub

The colourful framed reference

Adrenaline creating this rainbow spectrumed euphoria of mania

Wave after wave the mania and hupomania

But the shadow looms

A once rainbow spectrum frame of reference which knows loss of conscience

Reverts to black and white to filter this frame of reference

The dichotomy

Euphoria fooled into its clutches and spells a so say happier state to seduce me into its clutches

The lack of control

The lack of personal safety

The choice to have boundaries dissolved

Freedom from the dominators of my shackled past

Jailed in a wardrobe

Strangulation but these were just some

Drama the constant state

Eggshell walking to manage this status quo

Storms caught me unawares back then after the reality in that frame of reference mode of survival engulfing my throat at his hands to relax my body to survive at the clutches of his hands

Three knocks on the thin wall I managed

Flashing memories on film roll in my minds eye

This eased over time for some while others remain

My actions no is embracing

my survival

My freedom

And relinquishing my power

For the flaws of my illness are all hidden positives

I stand here now to break most cycles and I pledge to work on more

No longer trending water resisting and fighting the current of the tide

No I see my choices

For I choose to conserve my energy to maintain my restored frame of reference

Which maintains my inner stability

For I now float coasting the ebb and flows that life brings to this watered framed reference here on in.

Copyright Myfanwy 2020 ©

A constant state of trauma