Soul Survivor by Chelle 💫#Coffeeandachat @coffeeandachat1 #StarfishClub #BraveWords #PoetryHub #Poetry #PoetryCommnunity #WritingCommunity #PTSD #ItsOkNottobeOk #TogetherWeStand

Faces of six befall this vessel with assaults of each to this vessel

This vessel devoid of mind

This vessel devoid of voice

She raised her call but no words befell her

Mute she lay

The illed mind brings these series of moments to haunt beguile and taunt this vessel

Dank and defiled this vessel lay along this course and this soul felt cursed

For defiled dank and numb she lay

The illed mind

travelled far and wide

while remaining seated

To the depths of despair

Encased in darkness

The black fog encased this vessel within a reinforced glass prison

All laughed on

All knowing that this was her mental health prison

Yet still they all laughed on.

The prison held her and encased her for 18 years

Running on empty

For so long

Sleep of the mind knew not this vessel

5mins was at its heights for many months all afforded to this vessel a

Hot wiring knew this vessel then for too long

Having to reboot itself each time

Faces of the men befall this vessel

For these series of moments touched and ravaged this vessel

Shame

Fear

Guilt

And Anger aimed at itself only then

For this vessel protected itself not she felt

Yet she stands here now to say this soul knows pain of a different kind

For her body went through all five responses of shock and this vessel knew them all

fight

Flight

Friend

Flop and

Freeze

I am in the operating seat of this vessel now to say she is alive

She is free

She is Resilient

She survives past these flashes of memories

She surrenders herself to belief

She surrenders to positivity and positive psychology

She surrenders herself to DBT

For the dark dank fog lifts

For I choose to look at this wholly as it stands in my life own way

On my terms

In my safely controlled space in the here and now

For no longer do these memories come back of their own accord for I remember and I choose to set them free in a timed fashioned way to recall them

To lay bare now for all to see the traumas of this soul one by one for there are many that are etched in this souls mind.

Yet the course to freedom is not without pain

Yet the course to courage is not without pain

Yet the course of strength to bounce back gets quicker each time for I choose to harness this power from this day forward to the next

I release you from this heart of love

for I forgive myself for not protecting it

I release the pain

I release this with acceptance that it was bad but I overcome it

and I survived to live another day to tell you all of this now and is a soul survivor.

©all rights reserved by the author Chelle 09/2020

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